Tuesday, April 12, 2011

HAWMC Day 12!

Ekphrasis (writing about another art form). An ekphrasis gives life to a piece of art through storytelling. An ekphrasis in writing can be completely made-up fiction or it can explain the visual details of the original art piece. Today’s prompt is to create an artistic blog post inspired by someone else’s visual art.

After spending a good 30 minutes browsing Flickr's Creative Commons I have finally made up my mind and found the perfect picture.

by ` TheDreamSky from Flickr Creative Commons

*Timer set* One thing that L and I have been trying to actively work on is our marriage. It is, as always, a work in progress. Some days are better than others but that is not a situation unique to living with someone with a mental illness. Not that it makes it any easier but every marriage has its issues. I would be willing to go as far as to say that no marriage is perfect and I personally would be wary of anyone claiming otherwise.

We celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary last December. A milestone that many (and at times that included the two of us) did not think we would reach. There are still times when L is doubtful that we will last much longer but that is generally because he is not doing well mentally and gets the thought that I will leave him stuck in his head.

How did we get this far despite all the trials we have faced? From a surprise pregnancy with our oldest, to separation from the military, to all the issues we have seen because of his illness. We have endured more than many people will in much longer marriages. It takes work. A lot of work at times but it is worth it to me. That is the advice I always give to someone getting married. I have heard people say that once they are married things will be easy because there won't be any need to impress the other person anymore. Yet if we get complacent in our marriage (or any relationship) that is when the issues start.

Over 6 years and by now three kids later we still try to make time for just us. We are lucky enough to have family that helps us achieve this but even if they were not there we would still try to make sure to have just 'us' time. Downtime for the two of us to reconnect after a busy week for me and after dealing with the stress of every day life. We are not always successful at leaving the week's problems behind but at least we try. We need that down time for us, for our marriage and to be able to tackle the next week or month ahead of us.

The three words magnified in the photo are fall in love. It is something I try to do over and over. I fell in love with him the first time back in 2004 but that doesn't mean that small every day things like him taking Miss K fishing or seeing him for the first time with Mr K don't make me fall in love with him all over again. It is what keeps me going and I hope and pray that I will never get to the point were falling in love with my husband again and again has become impossible.


1 comment:

Chrisa said...

Really good points. Marriage, especially with a chronic illness to deal with, isn't easy. It's a bit more of a struggle for folks like us than for neurotypical families. Tom and I are staring down the barrel of 21 years and, while we definitely had our rough patches, we both feel we are stronger today than we were a decade ago. And we're looking forward to our 25th.

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