Through my volunteer work with an exchange student program I qualified for a trip to Vegas. This trip is coming up soon. From the time I found out that I qualified it has caused anxiety in L. It is only a 4day/3night trip but the anxiety he is feeling is building more and more.
Since his mental health problems started to get worse in October 2006 (and in some ways before that as well) he has become very dependent on me being there for him. Even when he was admitted to the hospital and on his camping trips I was still close by and if necessary could be there within few hours at the most. This time I will not be able to come back until my plane is scheduled to leave Vegas. It is making him very uncomfortable.
His mind has been going non-stop about all the bad things that might happen while I am gone. Logically speaking he knows that the things he is afraid of will not happen or are extremely unlikely to happen. It is the old 'What if...' game that he is so good at. We spent an hour at his last appointment talking to his counselor about these issues and tried to find ways to make him more comfortable with the idea of me going on this trip. He has another appointment next week before I leave to talk to his counselor again.
I hope that this will end up being a (somewhat) good experience for him that will show him that he will be okay and that he CAN do this. It is making me nervous as well since I don't know how he will do during this time. In the end I need this though. I need to get away for a while and just try to relax and recharge.
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