Thursday, May 13, 2010

I just want to shield them from this

I know I have talked about L doing worse and worse over the past few days. Yesterday the trend continued. We went to Target to return something and on the way there he informed me that he needed something to eat. Problem #1? No money until I get paid later this week. We have food at home, all bills are paid (on time for the first time in a while) and he knew that. He was counting on the money from the return. Problem #2? Money for return was refunded to my card and of course wasn't available immediately. That is where the 'fun' began.

He was unwilling (or unable) to believe me that there was no money for him to buy anything so since he was under the assumption that I was not telling the truth he kept spinning himself up more and more. Both girls picked up on it of course. Little K reacted by getting more and more upset herself. Miss K tends to try to console her daddy and try to talk to him which just gets L more upset. All I can do is try to do damage control by trying to keep the girls as calm and quiet as possible (which is very difficult when in a car). It got to the point where I had to tell L that if he did not stop yelling and carrying on like that I would just drop him off at our house and go stay at the apartment for the night with the girls. It seemed to help and he started calming down after a few more loud outbursts.

I wish I could shield the girls from seeing their dad like this. After we got home Miss K and I talked about what had happened and she was very worried about her daddy and asked if he needed some more alone time to get better again.


Melissa Mashburn said...

This has to be very difficult for you. Trying to protect them and trying to get him to calm down cannot be easy. Actually, this kind of made me want to cry. Don't you stay stressed all the time? I would, not knowing exactly what could trigger an outburst like this in him would have me on pins and needles all the time.

Kris said...

@Melissa I have had to stop worrying about stuff like that. If I didn't. I would be in a constant state of anxiety which wouldn't be good for any of us. It's still very stressful but I had to learn that there are things that are just out of my control.

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