After taking a few days off from the dare because of a sick daughter (I know, I know. Excuses) I am back and ready to tackle dare 7!
Where will dare 7 take us? It is taking us deep inside us and calls for a good look at some of our habits. There are two 'rooms' inside of us. The first one is the 'Appreciation Room'. Early on in our relationship we spent a lot of time in it. This room is covered in writings about the good qualities and characteristics and attributes of our partner. Things like 'wonderful cook', 'great listener', 'honest', 'loving'... But there is also the 'Depreciation Room'. It is filled with negative thoughts, all those negative habits your spouse has and any wrongdoings from the past. All of their hurtful words, unkind actions and poor decisions are collected here. Here is where future arguments are practiced and ammunition for the next fight is found. If we spend too much time in here we start falling out of love and are in danger of completely forgetting about the first room.
While the collection in the Depreciation Room holds its own truth, we need to remember that we all sin. That we all have our shortcomings and that our partner has this same room about us inside them. We need to remember to look at the first room and to forgive our partner for their shortcomings. We need to make the first room our home and try to not dwell on the contents of the second one. In order to truly love our spouse we must spend time in the Appreciation Room and continue to explore the things we have put there in the past, are putting there now and leave room to add more to our collection.
For today's dare get two pieces of paper. On the first one write down the positive things about your partner. On the second one do the same with the negative things. Take both lists and hide them for the day. Sometime later today, pick up the first list and look at it again before putting it back into its hiding place.
Monday, March 22, 2010
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