Thursday, March 18, 2010

~Dare Four~ Love is not rude

Over the months and years of being together we get more and more comfortable with each other. While that has definitely it's good sides, there is one important drawback. We start being 'rude' both knowingly and unknowingly. What is and isn't rude behaviour is seen differently by everyone. Most people will be careful to display impeccable manners in front of other people, yet what we do behind closed doors around our partner can be completely different thing.

Especially when things get difficult we get less considerate of the other person. According to 'The Love Dare' there are two different reasons for why people are rude: ignorance and selfishness. Little children display rude behaviour because they simply don't know better. As adults we generally don't have that excuse unless we are traveling to another country and are unaware of the customs of that place. But even then, a good traveler will have done his research and try to avoid situation that might be rude.

Then there are also those times when we fail to see how our own behaviour is affecting others. Ask yourself these questions:

How does your spouse feel about the way you speak and act around them?
How does your behaviour affect your mate's sense of worth and self-respect?
Would your husband or wife say you're a blessing, or that you are condescending and embarrassing?

I tend to be very sarcastic at times and even though I know that most days Luke does not like it I have a very difficult time stopping myself from making little sarcastic comments. And there are things he does that I cannot stand. Maybe with these three rules we will finally be able to work on this.

1. Guard the Golden Rule Treat your mate the same way you want to be treated.
2. No double standards Be as considerate to your spouse as you are to strangers and coworkers.
3. Honor requests Consider what your husband or wife already asked you to do or not to do. If in doubt, ask.

Finally, let's move on to today's dare. Ask your spouse for three things that cause him or her to be uncomfortable or irritated with you. Do so without justifying your behaviour or attacking them. Just ask and think about what they said.

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